Friday, 22 December 2017

The Delicate Episode 9

I culled on my bed drawing and for a moment I can't believe I actually draw this. I succeeded in persuading my mum to allow me eat In my room, I told her that am not feeling fine and that I don't want to step out of the room through out today and if am hungry I will eat the food she had dropped in my room before she and dad left for groceries shopping.
Dad always escort her every Saturday for her groceries shopping cause that's the only day they get to stay at home and enjoy each others company. My mind went back to my ordeal, he has mummy so why me? Why take my innocence, why spoil the picture I had of my family? Why change my view of him? I will never forgive myself if really this is all my fault. Did I seduce him to it or is it just him?
I forcefully draw on the sheet of carbon paper in front of me for the first time, painting on it with every single strength I have left and with every colour of crayon I see, trying my very best not to cry or break down again today, as tears roll down my face. I didn't care what I was drawing, to hell! I didn't even know what it was that I was drawing. I just want to forget everything and focus on my drawings. I started feeling a little better and my tears were beginning to dry up though some had wet the sheet so wiped it out.
Staring at it, the drawing. It looks like I had passed a message through it, like I was telling anyone that sees it, what am going through. Is so beautiful but had this aura of sadness associating with it. it looked so much like a master piece. I think this is the best art I have ever draw but it didn't excite me nor made me feel happy. It just made me feel less sad and normally, the person to see this drawing would have been my dad but now I don't even want to see him again. I stared at the food mum had dropped earlier and then the drugs. I think am beginning to feel headache so I took the drugs and swallow it with the support of the water then I eat a little bit before dropping the food back then cull back to my bed. I didn't know when I slept off but when I woke up, daddy is in my room. Staring at me like he was trying to tell me something.
I feel so scared of his presence but then I see my mum standing just behind him. She's holding something, oh my God she has seen it. I stare at her in horror, what am I going to tell her? That that's the symbol of my virginity and that I lost it to my dad? She looked at the bed spread then back to me.
“ Ama you should have told me that you are seeing your menstruation that's why you are not feeling too well. Do you still have some always pad with you or should I get you some? ” she asked.
I sighed in relief that she didn't notice that it wasn't my period but my blood. “ no I still have some mum and am sorry for the stain ” I quickly apologized. I look at my dad but he refused to look back. Probably out of shame for what he did. I tried my best not to let the tears fall this time.
“ is okay sweetie, I will wash them myself. ” she said and left, leaving me with daddy. For a moment I thought he's going to apologize for what he did but no he didn't, instead he shocked me with his words.
“ good girl, keep it this way and I will go easy on you next time but the day you will say a word, your mum, brother and yourself will die by my hands ” he said and headed for the door then he turned again “ oh before I forget, you taste good by the way and I love your outfit right now ” he chuckled “ wait for me tonight princess. ” I stared in both horror and shock as he leaves. “ tonight again? Is this really my dad? ” tears flow freely on my cheek, I just allowed it to flow and I couldn't hold myself any more so I broke down In tears. “ No... No, No!!! ” I cried.
9th Law Of Power : Win Through Your Actions, Never Through Argument.
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