Sunday, 17 December 2017

Oga Titus Episode 5

Titus:Why I go sabi that kind person…You know am?
Chinedu: Sure na…Her papa get money and she never marry,she dey find husband like say tomorrow no dey.
Titus:NTA reporter..How you take know, no be me and you dey always dey shop?How you con know
Chinedu: Forget that side,I dey current na
Titus:Na you sabi
Chinedu: You know say you fine pass me so you go toast am.
Titus:E do, e do,e do…Ah ah oya go do the work before she go come
Chinedu:Just think am o,na our opportunity to Make money be this
Titus:Mtcheew
Chinedu: If you wan make am, na wetin you go do be vat
Titus:(already snoring)
Chinedu: Na so so sleep e sabi,see am..E dey snore like pig
(15min later)
Chinedu: Oboy wake up,I don finish go pump am
Titus:Abeg just help me (still closing his eyes)
Chinedu: I don know say na wetin you go do buh I no go Gree..
Titus:Abeg help me if you do am I go toast am
Chinedu: Na you talk am o
Titus:Yes
Chinedu:okay o
Titus continued sleeping while Chinedu pumped the tyre…
****2hrs later****
Chinedu: Wake up joor(slapping him heavily)
Titus:Chisos,you wan kill me?
Chinedu: Since I dey call you nko
Titus:I no hear na
Chinedu: How you go hear,see that madam don come go give am the tyre and toast am join o
Titus:See your head, wetin I go tel am now you know say I dey shame
Chinedu: Kai,how me and you take meet..The tin you dey tel those ashawo tel am…Mumu
Titus:if she slap me ehn,wetin I go do you,you go see.
Chinedu:Go fast,carry tyre o
Titus went to meet her and he greeted
Titus:Welcome ma
Madam:How are you?
Titus:I dey fine
Madam: Why is your face like this
Titus:Nothing
Madam:Tell me joor
Titus:Errrm…eerrrm,I no like as you do 4 morning
Madam:Am sorry, I was going late that’s why..Is that all?
Titus:No…no ma
Madam: Tell me,
Titus:Madam..madam..No vex o for wetin I wan talk
Madam: I won’t
Titus:The tin be say chai…The talk heavy for mouth………….Madam I too like you o
As he said it,he ran away fast before she slap him
Madam:Come now,who is pursuing you
Titus:Madam, you no vex?
Madam: Not at all..So you like me or love me which one
Titus:madam anyhow you see am but my heart dey always knack for you if I see you
Madam: Hmmm…Can I meet you at that Mr Biggs in Egbeda by 1pm
Titus:Okay ma,no problem
Madam: Don’t call me ma,call me Laura
Titus:Lo ra
Madam:Nah,Laura
Titus:Oh Lawyer
Madam: Say Lau
Titus:Law
Madam: Ra
Titus:Ra…Lawra
Madam: Whatever so what’s your own name
Titus:Titus
Madam: Tites (using phonetics pronunciation)
Titus:No be tightest,Titus
Madam: You mean Tites fish?
Titus:Madam, see you too,you no sabi pronounce ordinary Titus..E dey hard you, so you see say we fit ourself.
Madam:(laughing) Put the tyre in the boot,see you tomorrow
He kept the tyre in the boot and collected his money.
Chinedu: How far,how e go
Titus:She say make I meet am for Egbeda Mr Biggs by 1pm
Chinedu: Aaah that place too far na..
Titus:Sheybi na you talk say make I toast am
Chinedu: Eeeh nothing spoil, tomorrow you go go
Titus:Guy I need good clothes, I no fit wear the clothes I get for house..You know say dey don wash.
Chinedu: Na true o..Eh wetin go happen be say we go borrow Obi suit
Titus:You sure say e go greee?
Chinedu: Why not
Titus:Okay na…
****Chiefs house****
Laura and Lara are seen talking
Laura:I met another guy today, he’s quite handsome.
Lara:What’s his name?
Laura:Oh!I forgot to ask o
Lara:Sis you are funny o..What’s his occupation
Laura:I don’t know too
Lara:Ah ah where did you guys meet.
Laura:In a bank and we are going on a date tomorrow
Lara:Wow,the guy must be a big boy.. You are having luck o
Laura:Yes o
****The next day****
Titus is seen preparing while Chinedu is checking out
Chinedu: O boy you are beautiful o
Titus:You dey craze.How you go use beautiful for a boy ehn?
Chinedu: Oga teacher e con be wetin
Titus:No be beautiful, na pretty..So next time say o boy you pretty o
Chinedu: Okay sir,na im be say if boy na pretty den girl go be beautiful
Titus:Noo,how girl wan take be beautiful..You go say Girls are handsome
Chinedu: Den beautiful, who get am
Titus:Na Animal get beautiful.. You fit say that dog dey beautiful ooo
Chinedu: okay,fine na for who
Titus:Fine na 4 plant…like now,you fit say that flower fine o
Chinedu: E don do,come begin go..See how the suit be like feather,e too big….When na so so woman you go dey knack
Titus:Make I commot am?
Chinedu: No o,e fit you
Titus:You sure?
Chinedu: Yes na
Titus:Chai,na only 100n I get..na im be say I go use 50n enter okada go come
Chinedu: How you go enter okada,you no know say breeze go dey blow the suit?
Titus:Wetin ah go do
Chinedu: Enter taxi like you be big boy. Bcoz she fit see you on top okada and e no go good like that.
Titus:Taxi na 100n na,how I go do come back
Chinedu: She go give you money na
Titus:Okay,make I dey waka na
to be continued…

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