Sunday, 17 December 2017

Oga Titus Episode 4

Laura:So how’s your girlfriend?
(I guess Laura wasn’t expecting a straight forward answer)
Richard: She’s fine, like she’s okay.I even spoke with her before you came here.
Laura:(provoked)So why are you cheating on her
Richard: Excuse me,did you say cheat?
Laura:Yea,cheat..
Richard: Explain what you mean by that
(Laura who is known for getting angry at little things, as I can see now,she is really upset)
Laura:If you weren’t cheating on her then why did you hook up with another girl on a date,I mean you just wasted my time coming here.
Richard: Sorry ma o,sorry ma buh were you thinking I was single?….Like a fresh dude like me without a girlfriend? Wait a minute, were you thinking I was gonna ask you to be my girlfriend? Jeeez,you even called yourself girl not even lady.ooops!did I say lady?you are a woman, yes!a full grown woman old enough to be my….kpozaaaa!!
(A security came in immediately when he saw things were getting out of hand and told them to leave)
Laura:(picking up her bag)B-----d!
Richard: I can’t lay hands on you coz you ain’t my type b---h… Respect is reciprocal madam Laura…
(Laura was so angry that she pushed the security man away and got into her Prado jeep)…
***at home***
Lara:So how did it go dear sister
Laura:It went really bad,I mean twaz a waste of time.
Lara:What really happened?
(Laura went ahead to explain in full details)
Lara:But are we that old??
Laura:See mirror there,go and check don’t ask me.
Lara:That means dad has always been right,
Laura:Yea…
****next day****
(Laura took her car to the vulcanizer)
Chinedu:Hey,Titus that madam don come again o
Titus:Okay make I go answer am.
Chinedu: Good boy
Titus:Your father yansh
Chinedu: (laughing)
(Titus went to meet her)
Madam:Weldone o
Titus:Welcome ma
Madam: I want to fix my tyre.
Titus:Madam,sorry o
Madam:For what?
Titus:We nor dey fix tyre for here,na only pump and patching we dey do
Madam:Oh,the two is what I will like to do
Titus:But na you come day before yesterday na,
Madam:You must be dreaming, come on go and take the tyre in the boot.
Titus:No vex madam
(He went and took the tyre)
Madam: Make sure you finish it before I come back
Titus:Okay ma…Your money na…(she zoomed off)Why this woman dey behave like this today na…Chinedu come help me push am enter shop jareeeh.
Chinedu: Lazy man
Titus:I no be man,
Chinedu: You com be wetin
Titus:I be guy
Chinedu: (pushing the tyre)mumu,for your mind.You no know say you don old?
Titus:Me wey just reach 28…Waka there
Chinedu: Abegi,I go do the tyre and you go pump am.
Titus:No wahala…Make I use that one run sleep
Chinedu:Na only sleep you sabi,if I call your name and you no answer na better slap ah go give you
Titus:You better no just try m
Chinedu:Wait, shey you notice anything for that woman
Titus:Yes
Chinedu: Thank God say you sef notice am
Titus:Say she dey harsh today abi?
Chinedu: No,you no see how she dey look you?
Titus:(touching chinedu neck) chaii….no wonder..Malaria don start,make I run go buy medicine.
Chinedu:Idiot,come back here…You no sabi that lady?
to be continued…

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